Learning Imperfectly

Reflection after taking 11 youth to GA 2017 --Part 1 of 2--

'Karma' by Korean sculptor Do Ho Suh**

Our youth program has settled into a groove of weekly meetings each year, sprinkled with a few service learning trips and social outings. Generally the end of each year culminates with the largest of these experiences. This year, many of us ended our year together by spending almost a week in New Orleans, attending General Assembly.

Last year was the first year I ever attended GA, flying down to Columbus, OH with our youth group coordinator and 3 youth, we felt our way through the gathering awkwardly, and travelled on to West Virginia afterward to engage in a week of community service learning joined by 9 more youth and 2 other advisors from our church. GA2016 fell into the shadows of the second part of that trip, but we certainly brought home a new fascination with this mega-church sized gathering of UU’s from all corners of the country and beyond.
This year, the justice theme of General Assembly, as well as the location and costs associated, led us to commit wholeheartedly to GA as our end of year trip. We wanted to find ways to engage in the community while we were in New Orleans, and so we signed on to one of the service learning opportunities created by the CELSJR for attendees at GA. Our group participated in a morning discussion with staff from Ubuntu Village, an advocacy organization supporting incarcerated youth in New Orleans. The discussion was interesting and our youth were clearly taking in the information being shared. Then, following the discussion we had the opportunity to visit a youth detention facility and meet about 50 incarcerated youth.
The part of the program was pretty awkward. We arrived, a multi-generational pack of about 50 people, mostly white, each holding a paper gift bag we had put together along with a card we had written, anonymously addressed to one of the youth we would meet, packed along side deodorant, a pair of socks, some shampoo. We walked through the facility as groups of about 10 youth at a time came out to greet us, all but one were black, all but two were male, and they were each instructed to say thank you to us as we, in turn, each awkwardly handed one youth a gift bag.
There were a few questions exchanged, more than a few moments of kind eye contact, I heard longings amongst the youth traveling with me that they might have time to throw a basketball around, or just hang out and let the awkwardness of this initial encounter drift away a little, but this was the extent of the time we would have together. We were soon moving on to the next area, and in not much more than 30 minutes, we had come and gone. Leaving behind a building filled with youth the same age as those with whom I was traveling. Children- on the cusp of adulthood, growing into themselves -but children. One of whom had observed while we were there that he felt safer inside this facility than he did at home, but of course he missed being home, and he missed being free, but also, he felt safer.
In my mind I think about this complexity, and it strikes me like every other aspect of the program that day, that none of this is simple- except for the fact- that children do not belong in prison.

We left with very little chance to even reflect as a group. We returned to the convention hall and had to hurry off to the next event. It wasn’t until later that evening that our youth and facilitators had a chance to gather on the patio where we were staying, and talk about what had happened, about what we thought of the experience, and about why it was set up the way it was. The beginning of our reflection included a fair amount of critique about how the trip went- that it felt rushed, and awkward, and that it felt like our being there was the opposite of comforting for the youth living in that facility, there wasn’t enough time, and so on.. When everyone had a chance to speak, I agreed that it didn’t feel great. Then I shared three things that I knew-

Talking with staff from Ubuntu Village and the Youth Facility

1. That the CELSJR, who organized the trip, were a group who I have worked with before, who I know to be incredibly thoughtful and intentional about how they work with this community from within this community.
2. That I suspected finding small ways to offer people an opportunity to engage here in NOLA within the constraints of GA (Lots of people, limited time, many other obligations pulling staff in multiple directions) was a very challenging task for CELSJR. and
3. Ubuntu village, though not a group I knew before this experience, clearly had a strong relationship of trust and support with the facility we visited, as evidenced by the fact that we were allowed to come in at all.

So, I asked our youth, "Considering those things, what do you think the folks who created this program hoped for us to learn in this experience? What was meaningful for you, what might you remember as you move forward? How does this day fall into the context of the reading and reflecting we’d been doing* over the past few months as we got ready for GA?"

What followed was a beautiful deepening of our first round of reflections, new insights and observations, and agreement that even in it’s imperfection, it had been a valuable experience.
This feels like an important thing to hold up- that we look for the balance that comes from complex endeavors. That we are cautious and thoughtful about how we engage, particularly when it involves marginalized and disenfranchised people, but also that we remember to ask new questions and different questions. That we remember to take time to reflect on experiences even (or especially) if they aren’t perfect, and by reflect I do not just mean sit and critique the ways in which they may have fallen short, but also what is it we learn from engaging imperfectly? What do we know now for next time? What are we carrying forward?
I can not tell you what new understandings, or moments of insight any one of the youth from my congregation will be carrying forward with them into their life after our week in New Orleans. Those are for each of them to hold and to discover. I can say that there were some less than perfectly executed moments on our trip, and it is those moments right now, that I am feeling most grateful for- even as I soak in the brilliance of the 11 teens and two other adults with whom I traveled.
This is true about any ministry we offer to one another in all aspects of our faith. We do what we are able, we find ways to engage with each other, to challenge each other, to support each other-- to explore together, but we never really know how those points of contact with one another unfold within anyone else’s hearts. We only know ourselves, and our own unfolding.

'Love'  by, Robert Indiana**

That is a part of the magic, to me. It is why this work is so immeasurable and essential.

* Our preparation for this project included: Watching 13th on Netflix, reading several other articles from the GA prep materials, and engaging in discussions at youth group about youth incarceration statistics and the school to prison pipeline.

**Both Sculptures are a part of the Sculpture garden at City Park in New Orleans, in connection with the New Orleans Museum of Art.